Que raro que voy a regreser Estados Unidos manana, pero estoy lista porque me extrano ustedes, todos. Pero tambien voy a extanar Mexico, voy a extranar hablando en Espanol, voy a extranar futbol, voy a extranar los ninos, voy a extranar Ma. Pero mas de todos esos cosas voy a extranar una vida facil para creer que Dios no solo puede hacer cosas locas pero quiere, y va.
Pues, adios Mexico por ahora, gracias por todos!
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
Monday, August 3, 2009
God Speaks
The Lord has been speaking lately, or maybe im actually listening lately, either way i am so greatful, like i wrote in the last blog He speaks in our heart laguage, and how i love the sound of English!
Wednesday all of the mexican students and i spent twelve hours solo with the Lord. We dressed warm, were given a gallon of water, a whistle, a flashlight, and ONE match. Dan decided where on the mountain we each would go, with a lot of distance between each one of us, and up we each went one by one at 5 in the evening, and there we would stay until 5 in the morning. I began to gather as much fire wood as i could, kept thinking that i had enough, but why not get more while there was still light. Once i gathered all that i could, i sat there with my organzed by size piles of fire wood, and the chair i had made for myself becuase there were so many stickers on the ground. I kept looking at my water, and looking at my one match wondering-when i would take the first drink, i didnt want to drink it too fast, we didnt have dinner that night so water was going to have to fill my stomache-when would i strike my only match, if i did it too soon and ran out of firewood i would be cold, or if the match did not stike i would be without fire the whole night. I kept looking around the mountain to see when other people would start their fires. Eventually, i was too cold, and i thought someone had to be the first, so i started my fire. Sure enough not too much later three more fires started up, everyone was waiting for the first person, as the night went on everyone started their fire, but by two in the morning there were only two of us, and a half hour after that my fire was the only one shining on the mountain. I wanted to bring fire to each person, i knew where most of them were, but it was against the rules, i felt so bad knowing that they could see my fire and didnt have any warmth for themselves. Many times i thought about putting out my fire to make everyone else more comfortable. That's when the Lord spoke. He told me about how the peices of firewood were each like a verse from the Bible, and it was by them that my fire, my light to this world has the strength to shine. The ONE match i had, is my one life here, my one chance to make a difference in the Kingdom. The Lord began to remind me of how many times in my life, i have known the word of the Lord, and i have been passionate for Him, then i get around people who dont know Jesus, and im always the first to start sharing of His love, like how i was the first fire, i jump right into it. And so many times i let the fire die, i put my fire out when i am around nonbelievers so that they wont feel uncomfortable. It's not that i get tired, or that i am scared, but simply that i feel as though i am offending people, and i feel bad. I have accepted the verse 1 John 3:13-when Paul warns His the church that people are going to hate them, dont be suprised by that. This is something that i have never really struggled with, i dont mind if people dont like me or not, but i often put out my fire becuase i dont want people to think that becuase i love Jesus i dont like them. I have learned that it is not me that makes people uncomfortable, but that it is Christ, Jesus told me that it's not about me, it between Him and the people i am sharing with-"so step out of my way Kayla, and let what i have put in you, let ME shine." The Lord told me that i was not to put out my fire while i was on the mountain as symbol of no longer doing so in my life, and i didn't until 5:30 am, and i still had firewood left.
Isaiah 61:1-3 The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is upon me, for the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the poor. He has sent e to comfort the brokenhearted and to proclaim that captives will be released and prisoners will be freed. He has sent me to tell those who mourn that the time of the Lord's favor has come, and with it, the day of God's anger against their enemies. To all who mourn in Mexico, he will give a crown of beauty for ashes, a joyous blessing instead of mourning, festive praise instead of despair. In their righteousness they will be like great oaks that the Lord has planted for his own glory.
Since i have been here i have had the privilege to do partner with the Lord and do these things, at the same time the Jesus has met here and brought the Spirit of the Sovereign Lord with him to bring me good news, comfort me, release me from chains, and tell me about the Lord's favor and how He is angry with my enemies, he has given me a beautiful crown, joy, and praise-as He has used me to tranform people into great oaks, He has replanted me as a great oak for His glory. For this i am so thankful. I am so thankful that no matter how persistant i was to run away from the Lord He was more persistant to run after me, and no matter how stubborn i was to stay broken, He was more stubborn to heal me. Being here and recieving more of the Lord's heart for His people everyday, being anointed by the Sovereign Lord to do the amazing things spoken in this passage, i am more and more terrified of the day that i will have to say good bye.
The Mexican students left on Friday, and there were definately tears, which only led me to think about having to say good bye to the kids that i have been spending every week with, the youth boys who i know the Lord has so much for. I have found comfort in knowing that i am not the one who brought the Lord here to San Vicente, therefore i can not take Him with me when i leave, i know that He was here before me, and He is going to continue to be here. I have been learning how to pray with the Lord's heart for His people and love with His heart and yet protect my heart for when i have to say good bye. Reading Paul's letter to the churches, He loves them-yet continues to only visit, and trust the Lord with them, knowing that He loves them more than Paul could, Paul has to say good bye a lot...I am learning from Paul. The Lord has really opened my eyes to how big He is, realizing that there are kids similar to the ones in San Vicente all over the world, so many more, so many lost, and so many that He loves, so many who themselves are anointed by the Sovereign Lord. This is something that we have all always known, but the reality of that is something that i am grasping daily.
I cry thinking about having to say good bye these kids, knowing that i most likely will never see them again, and the Lord tells me to take a moment and jump into His shoes. So there i am in heaven, there are so many beautiful colors, colors i have never seen on Earth before, the angels are singing, and i am amazed by the absence of spiritual warefare. My children are coming to me, i love them so much, my heart is pounding with joy for everyone that i open the gates for that they may enter my presence forever, I tell them that they have made me proud, that they are my good and faithful servants, i thank them for loving me, and I smile as each one of them recieve the whole love that i have always had for them. Then come some of my children whom i have loved just as much, whom i had been patiently waiting for, but now my heart is tearing inside, i can only shed tears on the inside becuase this this justice, i must deny entrance for them and i send them forever into tormeant, forever they will be absent of my presence. As terrible as this is for them, as sorry as i am for them that they will live in tormeant forever, i am sad, i am angry, becuase i too wanted to spend eternity with them, i want to know my children, i want to love them, but now is good bye forever.
I have always realized how terrible it is for the people that are going to hell forever, i have always wanted to bring the truth for their sake, that they may not suffer. But standing in the Lord's shoes, my motives have changed, now i want to bring the good news so that my God, my Daddy, my Best Friend might not be sad. I am so sad to say good bye to these kids, but i still have the hope of maybe seeing them again, more-so i have the hope that one day they will get to meet the Lord face to face, that some day they will recieve real love. But when the Lord has to say good bye to his children, that He loves so much more than i do these kids here, and He says good bye forever, with no hope of them ever meeting Him face to face, no hope of them ever receiving love, and our God has to do this all the time!!!
The third of many things that the Lord has revealed to me lately, Tina and i were driving by a sheperd and his sheep and i began to thank the Lord for leaving His flock to come and get me-so many times. He told me to look at the rest of he flock, not just the sheperd that left them to come after me, but the rest of the flock that stayed strong while He was gone. He told me that i was to be a part of the flock that He could walk away from to get the others who have gone away. He told me that He is only able to walk away from His flock to go after those ones because He is able to trust His flock, He told me that He needs me to be one who will look over the flock while He is out on business. I dont know if that will make sense to very many of you, but it did to me...
This week is a lot of catch up things, making the casettes to pass out to the camps, cleaning a lot, and we have our last team coming Thursday night, they are from San Diego, but actually a Mexican team, not sure whether they speak English or not, but this weekend is going to be packed with working with indiginous tribes.
I am getting anxious to get home, but i am trying to stay grounded here, for my time remaining here, my prayer request is Colossians 1:11-12, thank you!
Love you all
Wednesday all of the mexican students and i spent twelve hours solo with the Lord. We dressed warm, were given a gallon of water, a whistle, a flashlight, and ONE match. Dan decided where on the mountain we each would go, with a lot of distance between each one of us, and up we each went one by one at 5 in the evening, and there we would stay until 5 in the morning. I began to gather as much fire wood as i could, kept thinking that i had enough, but why not get more while there was still light. Once i gathered all that i could, i sat there with my organzed by size piles of fire wood, and the chair i had made for myself becuase there were so many stickers on the ground. I kept looking at my water, and looking at my one match wondering-when i would take the first drink, i didnt want to drink it too fast, we didnt have dinner that night so water was going to have to fill my stomache-when would i strike my only match, if i did it too soon and ran out of firewood i would be cold, or if the match did not stike i would be without fire the whole night. I kept looking around the mountain to see when other people would start their fires. Eventually, i was too cold, and i thought someone had to be the first, so i started my fire. Sure enough not too much later three more fires started up, everyone was waiting for the first person, as the night went on everyone started their fire, but by two in the morning there were only two of us, and a half hour after that my fire was the only one shining on the mountain. I wanted to bring fire to each person, i knew where most of them were, but it was against the rules, i felt so bad knowing that they could see my fire and didnt have any warmth for themselves. Many times i thought about putting out my fire to make everyone else more comfortable. That's when the Lord spoke. He told me about how the peices of firewood were each like a verse from the Bible, and it was by them that my fire, my light to this world has the strength to shine. The ONE match i had, is my one life here, my one chance to make a difference in the Kingdom. The Lord began to remind me of how many times in my life, i have known the word of the Lord, and i have been passionate for Him, then i get around people who dont know Jesus, and im always the first to start sharing of His love, like how i was the first fire, i jump right into it. And so many times i let the fire die, i put my fire out when i am around nonbelievers so that they wont feel uncomfortable. It's not that i get tired, or that i am scared, but simply that i feel as though i am offending people, and i feel bad. I have accepted the verse 1 John 3:13-when Paul warns His the church that people are going to hate them, dont be suprised by that. This is something that i have never really struggled with, i dont mind if people dont like me or not, but i often put out my fire becuase i dont want people to think that becuase i love Jesus i dont like them. I have learned that it is not me that makes people uncomfortable, but that it is Christ, Jesus told me that it's not about me, it between Him and the people i am sharing with-"so step out of my way Kayla, and let what i have put in you, let ME shine." The Lord told me that i was not to put out my fire while i was on the mountain as symbol of no longer doing so in my life, and i didn't until 5:30 am, and i still had firewood left.
Isaiah 61:1-3 The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is upon me, for the Lord has anointed me to bring good news to the poor. He has sent e to comfort the brokenhearted and to proclaim that captives will be released and prisoners will be freed. He has sent me to tell those who mourn that the time of the Lord's favor has come, and with it, the day of God's anger against their enemies. To all who mourn in Mexico, he will give a crown of beauty for ashes, a joyous blessing instead of mourning, festive praise instead of despair. In their righteousness they will be like great oaks that the Lord has planted for his own glory.
Since i have been here i have had the privilege to do partner with the Lord and do these things, at the same time the Jesus has met here and brought the Spirit of the Sovereign Lord with him to bring me good news, comfort me, release me from chains, and tell me about the Lord's favor and how He is angry with my enemies, he has given me a beautiful crown, joy, and praise-as He has used me to tranform people into great oaks, He has replanted me as a great oak for His glory. For this i am so thankful. I am so thankful that no matter how persistant i was to run away from the Lord He was more persistant to run after me, and no matter how stubborn i was to stay broken, He was more stubborn to heal me. Being here and recieving more of the Lord's heart for His people everyday, being anointed by the Sovereign Lord to do the amazing things spoken in this passage, i am more and more terrified of the day that i will have to say good bye.
The Mexican students left on Friday, and there were definately tears, which only led me to think about having to say good bye to the kids that i have been spending every week with, the youth boys who i know the Lord has so much for. I have found comfort in knowing that i am not the one who brought the Lord here to San Vicente, therefore i can not take Him with me when i leave, i know that He was here before me, and He is going to continue to be here. I have been learning how to pray with the Lord's heart for His people and love with His heart and yet protect my heart for when i have to say good bye. Reading Paul's letter to the churches, He loves them-yet continues to only visit, and trust the Lord with them, knowing that He loves them more than Paul could, Paul has to say good bye a lot...I am learning from Paul. The Lord has really opened my eyes to how big He is, realizing that there are kids similar to the ones in San Vicente all over the world, so many more, so many lost, and so many that He loves, so many who themselves are anointed by the Sovereign Lord. This is something that we have all always known, but the reality of that is something that i am grasping daily.
I cry thinking about having to say good bye these kids, knowing that i most likely will never see them again, and the Lord tells me to take a moment and jump into His shoes. So there i am in heaven, there are so many beautiful colors, colors i have never seen on Earth before, the angels are singing, and i am amazed by the absence of spiritual warefare. My children are coming to me, i love them so much, my heart is pounding with joy for everyone that i open the gates for that they may enter my presence forever, I tell them that they have made me proud, that they are my good and faithful servants, i thank them for loving me, and I smile as each one of them recieve the whole love that i have always had for them. Then come some of my children whom i have loved just as much, whom i had been patiently waiting for, but now my heart is tearing inside, i can only shed tears on the inside becuase this this justice, i must deny entrance for them and i send them forever into tormeant, forever they will be absent of my presence. As terrible as this is for them, as sorry as i am for them that they will live in tormeant forever, i am sad, i am angry, becuase i too wanted to spend eternity with them, i want to know my children, i want to love them, but now is good bye forever.
I have always realized how terrible it is for the people that are going to hell forever, i have always wanted to bring the truth for their sake, that they may not suffer. But standing in the Lord's shoes, my motives have changed, now i want to bring the good news so that my God, my Daddy, my Best Friend might not be sad. I am so sad to say good bye to these kids, but i still have the hope of maybe seeing them again, more-so i have the hope that one day they will get to meet the Lord face to face, that some day they will recieve real love. But when the Lord has to say good bye to his children, that He loves so much more than i do these kids here, and He says good bye forever, with no hope of them ever meeting Him face to face, no hope of them ever receiving love, and our God has to do this all the time!!!
The third of many things that the Lord has revealed to me lately, Tina and i were driving by a sheperd and his sheep and i began to thank the Lord for leaving His flock to come and get me-so many times. He told me to look at the rest of he flock, not just the sheperd that left them to come after me, but the rest of the flock that stayed strong while He was gone. He told me that i was to be a part of the flock that He could walk away from to get the others who have gone away. He told me that He is only able to walk away from His flock to go after those ones because He is able to trust His flock, He told me that He needs me to be one who will look over the flock while He is out on business. I dont know if that will make sense to very many of you, but it did to me...
This week is a lot of catch up things, making the casettes to pass out to the camps, cleaning a lot, and we have our last team coming Thursday night, they are from San Diego, but actually a Mexican team, not sure whether they speak English or not, but this weekend is going to be packed with working with indiginous tribes.
I am getting anxious to get home, but i am trying to stay grounded here, for my time remaining here, my prayer request is Colossians 1:11-12, thank you!
Love you all
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Just three weeks left
It is crazy to think that i have been here for seven weeks-so many people told me that i would look back and think that it went by so fast, but the truth is that i feel like i have been here for seven months. It seems like so much longer becuase so many things have happened, becuase i have learned and been a part of so much, it has been fascinating, at the same time extremely difficult. I apologize for not writing in a long time, which means that i am going to leave out a lot of big things that have happened...gives you all a chance to talk me to when i get home :)
Well the Little Country Team came and went, and i praise the Lord for choosing the time they came and for choosing who came. I needed some of "my" people that week, and the poeple that he brought were better than i could have hoped for. The highschool girls that came reminded me that i have something to go home to. I have been feeling like i could just live here, that i am being used here and falling to the lie that if i go home i will not be used, that there is no ministry at home for me. The Lord reminded how much my heart breaks for high school girls-it's hard to be a high school girl, and i am so excited to get home and be a part of their lives. The Lord also brought adults on the team that were like parents to me, that encouraged me, that told me they were proud of me-something that i have needed to hear. Something that i have always wanted to hear from a certain person my whole life it seems, and never have. During the LCC team's week here i heard it, and it was said so sincerely and with just strength that i heard it from the Lord's mouth himself, and no more do i feel like i need to hear it from that other person. Also-the young men that came on the team were men of the Lord, were strong men with a soft heart and sensative to the spirit, seeing that gave me hope, and sealed the healing that the Lord has b!een doing in me.
While the team was here we had "El Reventon" it was very similar to an Outreach America Blast, and the Lord showed up, people got saved. Also-something for everyone that came down to know-you guys changed hearts of boys that Dan and his staff have been praying for and spending time with for years. I am sure that you all remember Chulo, Papas, and Leo-if not, Tina's brother and two of the boys that worked with us during the week. These three boys have been around missionary teams, and around Christians their whole lives, but never wanted to be a part of it, i talked to some of you about the trouble with all the rules that the Mexicans put on being a Christian rather than a relationship with the Lord. Anyway, the Tuesday that you guys left, that night-all three boys accepted the Lord!!! :) Gracias a Dios!
Ever since the tea left i have not spoken or heard any English except for from Dusten's ipod-it has been difficult, but every day i am blessed that i understand what people are saying to me, that i dont have to translate in my head and think about my words before i respond but that i can have a conversation with ease. This is good considering i am living with about ten missionary students from different parts of Mexico. It has been a little bot difficult for me though becuase of the cultural differences, and the fact that i am the only American. For example, they make lots of comments about the differences in cultures and what they disagree with in our culture and make references to color. I know that it is not to be offensive but simply becuase different colors or cultures is not something that they have ever had to be sensative with becuase in Mexico there is only one color, one culture, one language-growing up in America we learn not to refer to someon by color, or not to disagree with cultures.
I went with the students to some labor camps about two hours away where there are lots of people who grew up speaking another idiom of Spanish, but once they are old enough to work they move from their tribe and only speak Spanish. We went around with a tape player, three different casette tapes and different maps of Mexico. We went door to door asking people if they spoke another idiom and if so where they were from, we found it on the map then searched the tapes which contained 300 different 30 second clips of idioms. When we found theirs i would have them listen to it, and make sure that they understood what it said, i would ask them to explain it to me in Spanish, and they i asked if they would like casettes in their proper idiom of messages of the Bible. It was amzing to see the faces of people when they heard their idiom outside of their tribe. There were so many that were not Christians, that would not have wanted anything to do with the Bible, but to have their heart language readily available for them to hear was an offer they could not pass up. It was great for me to be able to understand, being here and only hearing spanish, or hearing lessons of the Bible only in Spanish, even if i understand it all-it does not pentrate my heart the same way that English does. The Lord speaks to us personally in out proper language, in our heart language. Crazy-300 different idioms and they are all so close to the Spanish we learn in school on America, but here they are all SO different. In these labor camps there were children who did not know how to speak any spanish, they moved with their parents and couldnt play with any of the other kids becuase they couldnt understand each other, it was heart breaking. There was one boy in particular who my heart broke for, his name is Francisco and he is 16- he moved from his tribe to this labor camp more than seven hours away alone to work becuase his family has no money. He didnt speak very much spanish at all, but had sketchy tattoos that someone from the labor camp had put on him, looked like to be a part of a gang. When we began talking to him i was almost in tears just feeling the Lord's heart for this kid and how much the Lord wanted to preserve his childhood-the calling that this kid has on his life to bring truth to his tribe-but how trapt he is in all the lies of the enemy. I was on a team with Tina and Carlos for the casette assignment, she looked at me, and we both knew that we needed to pray for him. We asked him if we could, and then had Carlos pray for him, that way he could lay hands on him and it would not be crossing any cultural borders inapropriately. We are going back to these camps on Friday to hand out the tapes, very excited.
Friday is also the last day for the students that are here, then we have a team from Tijuana coming Saturday for a week. Please be praying for me during that week.
A big prayer for myself that i have had lately is that i will not fall into the trap of thinking that i only have three more weeks of work left to do, but i want to be a slave for the Lord even more so at home than i am here. It should be easier for me when i am at home in my confort zone to serve the Lord, to be sensative to His spirit. Mainly i have been praying that i would continue to walk in the freedom that the Lord has given me here, so many people at home know how stupid i have been in my past, and thinking about how many times the Lord has pulled out of the stupidity and i walked right back into it. Coming here it has been easy to be who the Lord has created me to be and walk freely from my past becuase no one here knows of my past. I am healed, and i am free, i am so thankful, and i am so excited becuase for the first time in my life i truely believe that the Lord has forgotten my trespasses, and He has blessed me, He has answered my prayers that i might forget them as well-and i have! I am free!
People i have been praying for a lot lately-Keely, Girlfriend, Gina, my small group Girls-the Lord has been giving me His heart for you, and He wants you to walk in the same freedom that i now am-He says that you dont have to go to Mexico for three months to recieve it!
Love you all!!!
Well the Little Country Team came and went, and i praise the Lord for choosing the time they came and for choosing who came. I needed some of "my" people that week, and the poeple that he brought were better than i could have hoped for. The highschool girls that came reminded me that i have something to go home to. I have been feeling like i could just live here, that i am being used here and falling to the lie that if i go home i will not be used, that there is no ministry at home for me. The Lord reminded how much my heart breaks for high school girls-it's hard to be a high school girl, and i am so excited to get home and be a part of their lives. The Lord also brought adults on the team that were like parents to me, that encouraged me, that told me they were proud of me-something that i have needed to hear. Something that i have always wanted to hear from a certain person my whole life it seems, and never have. During the LCC team's week here i heard it, and it was said so sincerely and with just strength that i heard it from the Lord's mouth himself, and no more do i feel like i need to hear it from that other person. Also-the young men that came on the team were men of the Lord, were strong men with a soft heart and sensative to the spirit, seeing that gave me hope, and sealed the healing that the Lord has b!een doing in me.
While the team was here we had "El Reventon" it was very similar to an Outreach America Blast, and the Lord showed up, people got saved. Also-something for everyone that came down to know-you guys changed hearts of boys that Dan and his staff have been praying for and spending time with for years. I am sure that you all remember Chulo, Papas, and Leo-if not, Tina's brother and two of the boys that worked with us during the week. These three boys have been around missionary teams, and around Christians their whole lives, but never wanted to be a part of it, i talked to some of you about the trouble with all the rules that the Mexicans put on being a Christian rather than a relationship with the Lord. Anyway, the Tuesday that you guys left, that night-all three boys accepted the Lord!!! :) Gracias a Dios!
Ever since the tea left i have not spoken or heard any English except for from Dusten's ipod-it has been difficult, but every day i am blessed that i understand what people are saying to me, that i dont have to translate in my head and think about my words before i respond but that i can have a conversation with ease. This is good considering i am living with about ten missionary students from different parts of Mexico. It has been a little bot difficult for me though becuase of the cultural differences, and the fact that i am the only American. For example, they make lots of comments about the differences in cultures and what they disagree with in our culture and make references to color. I know that it is not to be offensive but simply becuase different colors or cultures is not something that they have ever had to be sensative with becuase in Mexico there is only one color, one culture, one language-growing up in America we learn not to refer to someon by color, or not to disagree with cultures.
I went with the students to some labor camps about two hours away where there are lots of people who grew up speaking another idiom of Spanish, but once they are old enough to work they move from their tribe and only speak Spanish. We went around with a tape player, three different casette tapes and different maps of Mexico. We went door to door asking people if they spoke another idiom and if so where they were from, we found it on the map then searched the tapes which contained 300 different 30 second clips of idioms. When we found theirs i would have them listen to it, and make sure that they understood what it said, i would ask them to explain it to me in Spanish, and they i asked if they would like casettes in their proper idiom of messages of the Bible. It was amzing to see the faces of people when they heard their idiom outside of their tribe. There were so many that were not Christians, that would not have wanted anything to do with the Bible, but to have their heart language readily available for them to hear was an offer they could not pass up. It was great for me to be able to understand, being here and only hearing spanish, or hearing lessons of the Bible only in Spanish, even if i understand it all-it does not pentrate my heart the same way that English does. The Lord speaks to us personally in out proper language, in our heart language. Crazy-300 different idioms and they are all so close to the Spanish we learn in school on America, but here they are all SO different. In these labor camps there were children who did not know how to speak any spanish, they moved with their parents and couldnt play with any of the other kids becuase they couldnt understand each other, it was heart breaking. There was one boy in particular who my heart broke for, his name is Francisco and he is 16- he moved from his tribe to this labor camp more than seven hours away alone to work becuase his family has no money. He didnt speak very much spanish at all, but had sketchy tattoos that someone from the labor camp had put on him, looked like to be a part of a gang. When we began talking to him i was almost in tears just feeling the Lord's heart for this kid and how much the Lord wanted to preserve his childhood-the calling that this kid has on his life to bring truth to his tribe-but how trapt he is in all the lies of the enemy. I was on a team with Tina and Carlos for the casette assignment, she looked at me, and we both knew that we needed to pray for him. We asked him if we could, and then had Carlos pray for him, that way he could lay hands on him and it would not be crossing any cultural borders inapropriately. We are going back to these camps on Friday to hand out the tapes, very excited.
Friday is also the last day for the students that are here, then we have a team from Tijuana coming Saturday for a week. Please be praying for me during that week.
A big prayer for myself that i have had lately is that i will not fall into the trap of thinking that i only have three more weeks of work left to do, but i want to be a slave for the Lord even more so at home than i am here. It should be easier for me when i am at home in my confort zone to serve the Lord, to be sensative to His spirit. Mainly i have been praying that i would continue to walk in the freedom that the Lord has given me here, so many people at home know how stupid i have been in my past, and thinking about how many times the Lord has pulled out of the stupidity and i walked right back into it. Coming here it has been easy to be who the Lord has created me to be and walk freely from my past becuase no one here knows of my past. I am healed, and i am free, i am so thankful, and i am so excited becuase for the first time in my life i truely believe that the Lord has forgotten my trespasses, and He has blessed me, He has answered my prayers that i might forget them as well-and i have! I am free!
People i have been praying for a lot lately-Keely, Girlfriend, Gina, my small group Girls-the Lord has been giving me His heart for you, and He wants you to walk in the same freedom that i now am-He says that you dont have to go to Mexico for three months to recieve it!
Love you all!!!
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
Sunday, July 5, 2009
End of week Four
Yup, it has only been four weeks-i still have six more.
Thank you to all of you that are reading my blog, and a BIG thanks to those of you that are commenting, i have certainly had my times of homesickness and the comments help. To Paul-sorry about the CDL, those are gross. But dont plan on getting too used to Lake anyway, cuz i will be at South Bonneyview :) thanks for the encouragement-i love that my job was more than just a job.
Here i feel like it is a job too, but that it is one of a higher calling-since the last time i wrote a lot of heavy things have been happeneing.
So about a week ago i woke up and felt like i was at home, not like i was in another country. I am not affraid to talk to people in Spanish-when we drive around town people yell my name out to say hello. I really started to feel like i belong here and that this is so much more than just a missions trip-but that i am a part of San Vicente now-i started to feel like i could live here, that these people could be my family. With that comfort came more opportunities for me to share with people why i am here and a little about the path i took to get here. I had one day of that comfort until i went to sleep that night. I had a dream that i was in San Vicente on a missions trip and that my sister called and said that i had to come home immediately-that something terrible had happened. So in my dream i went home knowing tha i would be coming back to Mexico to finish what the Lord had for me. Once i got back to Redding-i tried and tried and tried to get back but i was not able to, every day i would wake up planning to get on the plane and every day i missed the plane. The dream ended with my falling asleep in my bed at home thinking about how in the morning i had to wake up determined to get on the plane becuase i knew that the Lord wanted me in San Vicente. The dream was so incredibly realistic that when i woke up in the morning i expected to be in the US. It was very difficult for me that next day-as if it was my first day here and all these people are talking to me like they know me. I have had that dream every night since then, and every morning it is difficult, not only difficult because i have to keep geting used to being in Mexico but more difficult becuase with every dream i have to return to home becuase some different terrible things has happened to my family or friend, thus during my days i am more and more worried about things going on at home. I actually woke up crying this morning. I have dedicated myself to falling asleep praying for different dreams, praying that i would continue to be faithful in giving my family and friends at home up to Him with confidence that He takes better care of you guys than i can, when you let Him, i pray every night in hopes that i will not have the dream again. Tonight i plan to annoint myself with oil-thank you Katie and i am hopeful that i will have a peaceful slumber.
This is only of many different ways that the enemy has been getting at me-but just in the last four days i have gotten much better at identifying the attacks and turning it over to the Lord that the enemy might flee. I have found confidence in the verse James 4:7 which says that if i humble myself before God, if i resist the devil that he will flee from me. So i am going to continue to resist him, more than that i have been so blessed by the fact that the Lord as yet to flee from me. Before i came down here i had spent a good amount of time resisting the Lord and what He had for me, and rather than fleeing he kept pressing closer and closer-thank you Jesus!!!
Since i have been here i have gotten to know Dan's youngest son, we call him Bibi, very well. The Lord has told me many things about what he has planned for this eight year old boy, and it has made me very excited, and at the same time, so scared that Bibi has the choice to not walk in what the Lord has for him. It has made me think a lot about the fact that i have had so many amazing poeple hep to raise me into a woman of the Lord, and i have so many times let the hurts of my blood family not growing me up in the Lord as an excuse to walk away from the Lord. So many of you have spoken life to me, have told me that you love me, have told me that the Lord has great plans for me, and so many times i turned you away and at the same time turned the Lord away becuase i wanted to here it from my real family. The heart that the Lord has given me for Bibi has made me realize how grateful i am for all of you. Thank you so much for all that you have done for me, thank you for the family that you have been to me, and for the way that you all have never given up on me. I think about Tippie and how much of my life she has walked me through, thank you Tippie, i love you a lot. Katie and Nick Ristow-you have told me the good and the bad. Dusten-pretty sure part of the reason that God made you the way you are is to help me become who He wants me to be. There have been so many of you!!! And i have spent the last week praying for you all, and thanking the Lord for you all, and asking for forgiveness for the blindness that i have been living in to the ways that i have hurt all of you in the times that i walked away from what the Lord had for me. Thinking about Bibi has helped me realize.
God has really been teaching me a lot more about the gifts that he has given me. I have learned that there is no difference in saying no to Him when He calls me to do or say something, and not listening to Him and what He would have for me to do or say. It has been amazing that the more i walk in a way to bless the Lord that He blesses me.
Being here is a blessing in and of itself. Yesterday i realized that i never wrote about my shoulder being healed, that right Luke-it still has yet to hurt!!! :) The say before i left, i had a friend come over to the house who has been given the gift of healing and told him about my shoulder that he been hurt for over two years and how i could ot even lift a jug of milk over my shoulder, or when i lift my arm different ways it hurt terribely, i told him that last summer i had a difficult playing with the kids, i could not shovel effectively...and that i did not want to go ten weeks with restaints, through prayer the Lord healed me, and there not been anything that i have not been able to do becuase of my shoulder. This was a huge encouragement for me to walk in my giftings, and the last two days i have been able to tell people what the Lord has in store for them if they choose it, or even what the Lord has in store in for them if they dont turn their lives around, doing so not afraid!
This morning Tina, Ma (her mom) and I went to the market, then we came home and made breakfast, while we were out a few different guys asked Ma if i they could talk to me. That led to some conversation while we were making breakfast, her telling me that i dont need to be talking to any guys who are not respectful and who do not have a house, and so on and so forth. Anyway, Ma and i have gotten very close, before i got here she was timid to hug, but i have been hugging her so much-so likes it, and has even started to hug Tina and Rey more and more. Anyway, she began to cry as she was making the salsa, saying that she is happy with make here because she knows that i am safe, but that when i go back she is going to be worried about me all the time, and that we have no way to talk to each other. She said that she is going to miss me and lots more as she began to cry, then Tina started crying-so of course i did too. I dont like that i am already worried about having to say goodbye.
I feel as though this blog has been a long ramble. To get to more practical things, we had three students from Mexicali come today who will be staying at the Remanent Center, we will be getting more every day, and they will be here anywhere from one to four weeks. The LCC team will be here in nine days and i am SO excited!!! we have been planing lots of things for that week.
Time to move to my new home for the week, i am staying with Dan and Amalia this week.
Biggest prayer requests for this week: That i would continue to build deep relationships not restrained by fear of saying goodbye. That Tina's mom and brother Rey would come to accept and know the Lord. That i would be listening more often to the Lord's voice. That i would have refreshing dreams!
Thank you to all of you that are reading my blog, and a BIG thanks to those of you that are commenting, i have certainly had my times of homesickness and the comments help. To Paul-sorry about the CDL, those are gross. But dont plan on getting too used to Lake anyway, cuz i will be at South Bonneyview :) thanks for the encouragement-i love that my job was more than just a job.
Here i feel like it is a job too, but that it is one of a higher calling-since the last time i wrote a lot of heavy things have been happeneing.
So about a week ago i woke up and felt like i was at home, not like i was in another country. I am not affraid to talk to people in Spanish-when we drive around town people yell my name out to say hello. I really started to feel like i belong here and that this is so much more than just a missions trip-but that i am a part of San Vicente now-i started to feel like i could live here, that these people could be my family. With that comfort came more opportunities for me to share with people why i am here and a little about the path i took to get here. I had one day of that comfort until i went to sleep that night. I had a dream that i was in San Vicente on a missions trip and that my sister called and said that i had to come home immediately-that something terrible had happened. So in my dream i went home knowing tha i would be coming back to Mexico to finish what the Lord had for me. Once i got back to Redding-i tried and tried and tried to get back but i was not able to, every day i would wake up planning to get on the plane and every day i missed the plane. The dream ended with my falling asleep in my bed at home thinking about how in the morning i had to wake up determined to get on the plane becuase i knew that the Lord wanted me in San Vicente. The dream was so incredibly realistic that when i woke up in the morning i expected to be in the US. It was very difficult for me that next day-as if it was my first day here and all these people are talking to me like they know me. I have had that dream every night since then, and every morning it is difficult, not only difficult because i have to keep geting used to being in Mexico but more difficult becuase with every dream i have to return to home becuase some different terrible things has happened to my family or friend, thus during my days i am more and more worried about things going on at home. I actually woke up crying this morning. I have dedicated myself to falling asleep praying for different dreams, praying that i would continue to be faithful in giving my family and friends at home up to Him with confidence that He takes better care of you guys than i can, when you let Him, i pray every night in hopes that i will not have the dream again. Tonight i plan to annoint myself with oil-thank you Katie and i am hopeful that i will have a peaceful slumber.
This is only of many different ways that the enemy has been getting at me-but just in the last four days i have gotten much better at identifying the attacks and turning it over to the Lord that the enemy might flee. I have found confidence in the verse James 4:7 which says that if i humble myself before God, if i resist the devil that he will flee from me. So i am going to continue to resist him, more than that i have been so blessed by the fact that the Lord as yet to flee from me. Before i came down here i had spent a good amount of time resisting the Lord and what He had for me, and rather than fleeing he kept pressing closer and closer-thank you Jesus!!!
Since i have been here i have gotten to know Dan's youngest son, we call him Bibi, very well. The Lord has told me many things about what he has planned for this eight year old boy, and it has made me very excited, and at the same time, so scared that Bibi has the choice to not walk in what the Lord has for him. It has made me think a lot about the fact that i have had so many amazing poeple hep to raise me into a woman of the Lord, and i have so many times let the hurts of my blood family not growing me up in the Lord as an excuse to walk away from the Lord. So many of you have spoken life to me, have told me that you love me, have told me that the Lord has great plans for me, and so many times i turned you away and at the same time turned the Lord away becuase i wanted to here it from my real family. The heart that the Lord has given me for Bibi has made me realize how grateful i am for all of you. Thank you so much for all that you have done for me, thank you for the family that you have been to me, and for the way that you all have never given up on me. I think about Tippie and how much of my life she has walked me through, thank you Tippie, i love you a lot. Katie and Nick Ristow-you have told me the good and the bad. Dusten-pretty sure part of the reason that God made you the way you are is to help me become who He wants me to be. There have been so many of you!!! And i have spent the last week praying for you all, and thanking the Lord for you all, and asking for forgiveness for the blindness that i have been living in to the ways that i have hurt all of you in the times that i walked away from what the Lord had for me. Thinking about Bibi has helped me realize.
God has really been teaching me a lot more about the gifts that he has given me. I have learned that there is no difference in saying no to Him when He calls me to do or say something, and not listening to Him and what He would have for me to do or say. It has been amazing that the more i walk in a way to bless the Lord that He blesses me.
Being here is a blessing in and of itself. Yesterday i realized that i never wrote about my shoulder being healed, that right Luke-it still has yet to hurt!!! :) The say before i left, i had a friend come over to the house who has been given the gift of healing and told him about my shoulder that he been hurt for over two years and how i could ot even lift a jug of milk over my shoulder, or when i lift my arm different ways it hurt terribely, i told him that last summer i had a difficult playing with the kids, i could not shovel effectively...and that i did not want to go ten weeks with restaints, through prayer the Lord healed me, and there not been anything that i have not been able to do becuase of my shoulder. This was a huge encouragement for me to walk in my giftings, and the last two days i have been able to tell people what the Lord has in store for them if they choose it, or even what the Lord has in store in for them if they dont turn their lives around, doing so not afraid!
This morning Tina, Ma (her mom) and I went to the market, then we came home and made breakfast, while we were out a few different guys asked Ma if i they could talk to me. That led to some conversation while we were making breakfast, her telling me that i dont need to be talking to any guys who are not respectful and who do not have a house, and so on and so forth. Anyway, Ma and i have gotten very close, before i got here she was timid to hug, but i have been hugging her so much-so likes it, and has even started to hug Tina and Rey more and more. Anyway, she began to cry as she was making the salsa, saying that she is happy with make here because she knows that i am safe, but that when i go back she is going to be worried about me all the time, and that we have no way to talk to each other. She said that she is going to miss me and lots more as she began to cry, then Tina started crying-so of course i did too. I dont like that i am already worried about having to say goodbye.
I feel as though this blog has been a long ramble. To get to more practical things, we had three students from Mexicali come today who will be staying at the Remanent Center, we will be getting more every day, and they will be here anywhere from one to four weeks. The LCC team will be here in nine days and i am SO excited!!! we have been planing lots of things for that week.
Time to move to my new home for the week, i am staying with Dan and Amalia this week.
Biggest prayer requests for this week: That i would continue to build deep relationships not restrained by fear of saying goodbye. That Tina's mom and brother Rey would come to accept and know the Lord. That i would be listening more often to the Lord's voice. That i would have refreshing dreams!
Monday, June 29, 2009
A 3rd of the way
These blogs are getting harder and harder to write, becuase i want to tell you all everything, but that is impossible.
Our second team left on Saturday, and they were a lot of fun, but unfortunately there were triggers to spiritual discernment that made the week very hard for me. i stayed with them at the Remnant Center and while many of their attributes made me miss the youth group in Redding, there were many times where i just sat in my room alone-prayig for them-and reading the letters and cards that you guys sent me with, thank you so much...they have really helped in my weak moments.
The team however was very good with the kids in the camp. There was one guy Erik who Tina and i both recieved the Lord's heart for, he spoke spanish and was very good with the kids. They would all line up as soon as the cars pulled in for Erik to spin them, the kids even got Erik to spin me on his shoulders (even though i fought it). I hae really fallen in love with these kids, at this particular camp there is over fifty and efter just seven visits, i know 90% of their names and who is related to who. My first day at the camp i chose to really love in these two brother Cezar 8, and Antonio 6, they were born in the states and had to move to the labor camp two years ago. They are much different than the other kids in the fact that they dont ever ask for a piggy back ride or to be spun. But the other day Cezar whipsered in my ear "cabaillto", they are finally recieving love and gaining courage. Then later i was holding Antonio and singing a song that i made up in Spanish about how i love him and Jesus loves him, and Jesus' love will never fail, and he looked at me and said "Te amo" WOW!!! these kids do not say those things. There is another boy Adaria 12, who comes to me everytime with new words that he wants translated into English, he wants to live in the States some day and be a lawyer. My prayer for him right now that is that the Lord provides a way for him to go to Jr. High. The kids get to go to school one day a week, and after what we would call elementary school they are not garunteed anything, becuase there is no way for them to get into town. I told Tina that while i am here i want to come once a week and teach the older kids math and english, she is trying to set that up.
Most all of the work that i have done so far has not bore any obvious fruit, and not that there is a problem with that becuase i know that "It's not important who does the planting, or who does the watering. What's important is that God makes the seed grow. 1 Corinthians 3:7" However, even knowing that, it is has been hard to not get discouraged and not listen to the enemy telling me that i am not doing anything here. Yesterday we went to Ensenada early in the morning to go to a church there, walking in reminded me so much of LCC, just the way that i was able to immediate feel the Holy Spirit. And i must admit that so far in over three weeks now that was the first time that i have felt the Holy Spirit, i have been hearing His voice, and i have known his presence, but the overwhelming feeling of His love, yesterday morning was the first time since the Thursday night before i left. of course...any of you that know me know that that means that i cried during the worship. and it did not matter that i didnt know what all the words meant, i knew that the people in that room had the same heart for the same God that i do. so i used the time of worship to pray, i prayed out loud, in English over all the people in there that they as well as the rest of us who know the Lord would look past color, look past culture, and language, and yearn to know the God more. The Lord is calling for people to be soldiers in His army, and that army fights united, for one cause, and one God, with one motivation-Love-and that love is universal because only God created it, only He is able to define it. There are so many other things that people in every country are falling to in search of love, and these things are claiming to be love, or able to teach love, and it is all a lie. I have become disgusted with the phrase "true love" as if there is a "false love" when in fact there is not. There is only love, and anything less than the Lord's definition of love is only lies. As we all, from every country come closer to the Lord, and learn to love each other the way that He does, and learn to love Him, the way that He deos we begin to fight together. The closer we indivually get to Him, they closer we get to eachother.
As i began to think of the work that i am doing here, and the way that the Lord has me loving people, i started to cry out for direction. To be enlightened to what He would be doing, if Jesus were in San Vicente for three months, what would He be doing differently, and then the strength to walk in that direction.
A few hours after that we were walking around Ensenada, and a guy stopped us by saying, you love Jesus, huh? Tina first wanted to just keep walking, but he was looking me in the eyes, and i couldnt just walk by. He told Tina to tell me that the Lord has a lot of work for me to do while i am here, and that i need to be sensative to the Holy Spirit becuase there are details. Then he said that the work that the Lord has for me will give me confirmation for the direction of my life.
Just as i was beginning to doubt...Jesus is FUNNY!
Our second team left on Saturday, and they were a lot of fun, but unfortunately there were triggers to spiritual discernment that made the week very hard for me. i stayed with them at the Remnant Center and while many of their attributes made me miss the youth group in Redding, there were many times where i just sat in my room alone-prayig for them-and reading the letters and cards that you guys sent me with, thank you so much...they have really helped in my weak moments.
The team however was very good with the kids in the camp. There was one guy Erik who Tina and i both recieved the Lord's heart for, he spoke spanish and was very good with the kids. They would all line up as soon as the cars pulled in for Erik to spin them, the kids even got Erik to spin me on his shoulders (even though i fought it). I hae really fallen in love with these kids, at this particular camp there is over fifty and efter just seven visits, i know 90% of their names and who is related to who. My first day at the camp i chose to really love in these two brother Cezar 8, and Antonio 6, they were born in the states and had to move to the labor camp two years ago. They are much different than the other kids in the fact that they dont ever ask for a piggy back ride or to be spun. But the other day Cezar whipsered in my ear "cabaillto", they are finally recieving love and gaining courage. Then later i was holding Antonio and singing a song that i made up in Spanish about how i love him and Jesus loves him, and Jesus' love will never fail, and he looked at me and said "Te amo" WOW!!! these kids do not say those things. There is another boy Adaria 12, who comes to me everytime with new words that he wants translated into English, he wants to live in the States some day and be a lawyer. My prayer for him right now that is that the Lord provides a way for him to go to Jr. High. The kids get to go to school one day a week, and after what we would call elementary school they are not garunteed anything, becuase there is no way for them to get into town. I told Tina that while i am here i want to come once a week and teach the older kids math and english, she is trying to set that up.
Most all of the work that i have done so far has not bore any obvious fruit, and not that there is a problem with that becuase i know that "It's not important who does the planting, or who does the watering. What's important is that God makes the seed grow. 1 Corinthians 3:7" However, even knowing that, it is has been hard to not get discouraged and not listen to the enemy telling me that i am not doing anything here. Yesterday we went to Ensenada early in the morning to go to a church there, walking in reminded me so much of LCC, just the way that i was able to immediate feel the Holy Spirit. And i must admit that so far in over three weeks now that was the first time that i have felt the Holy Spirit, i have been hearing His voice, and i have known his presence, but the overwhelming feeling of His love, yesterday morning was the first time since the Thursday night before i left. of course...any of you that know me know that that means that i cried during the worship. and it did not matter that i didnt know what all the words meant, i knew that the people in that room had the same heart for the same God that i do. so i used the time of worship to pray, i prayed out loud, in English over all the people in there that they as well as the rest of us who know the Lord would look past color, look past culture, and language, and yearn to know the God more. The Lord is calling for people to be soldiers in His army, and that army fights united, for one cause, and one God, with one motivation-Love-and that love is universal because only God created it, only He is able to define it. There are so many other things that people in every country are falling to in search of love, and these things are claiming to be love, or able to teach love, and it is all a lie. I have become disgusted with the phrase "true love" as if there is a "false love" when in fact there is not. There is only love, and anything less than the Lord's definition of love is only lies. As we all, from every country come closer to the Lord, and learn to love each other the way that He does, and learn to love Him, the way that He deos we begin to fight together. The closer we indivually get to Him, they closer we get to eachother.
As i began to think of the work that i am doing here, and the way that the Lord has me loving people, i started to cry out for direction. To be enlightened to what He would be doing, if Jesus were in San Vicente for three months, what would He be doing differently, and then the strength to walk in that direction.
A few hours after that we were walking around Ensenada, and a guy stopped us by saying, you love Jesus, huh? Tina first wanted to just keep walking, but he was looking me in the eyes, and i couldnt just walk by. He told Tina to tell me that the Lord has a lot of work for me to do while i am here, and that i need to be sensative to the Holy Spirit becuase there are details. Then he said that the work that the Lord has for me will give me confirmation for the direction of my life.
Just as i was beginning to doubt...Jesus is FUNNY!
Friday, June 19, 2009
Bye Bye ABC
Our first American team from ABC church left this morning. God is so good, i dont think that i could have chosen a better group of strangers to spend the week with. For those of you that know how important the Pettingells are to me, there was a family from this team that reminded me of them exactly, just what i needed for my second week here. I will be visiting them, all the women from their group spoke life into me and all the men were vessels of hope for me. The kids, they were just fun. I would take Ashley and Austin as my brother and sister anyday.
Although i do really miss my baby seester!
Living here is getting a lot easier, and the language is coming to me better, also i have built relationships with people which make it easier to communicate without words.
Coming here i knew that i would fall in love with the kids at the labor camps, but the lord has really emlarged my heart to love the Mexican people as a whole. Tina's mom has taught me a lot about her culture, she is Misteco, and has taken me under her wing to make sure that i know how to do everything the way that they do, which seems to be the hardest way possible...
I have fallen in love with the young teenage group of boys that we play soccer with and have in small groups.
At the labor camps we took pictures of people and the kids and handed them out, it was so difficult, these people dont have any pictures of anyone in their family, and they immediately put all others aside and only want more and more pictures for themselves, which was heart breaking to watch. Otherwise the people here seem to have things the right way, they put family before work and school, and social life, and all the things that Americans wrap their hearts around.
I am loving it here, and already after two weeks a lot of options have opened for me in the fall, a few that i am more excited about than others, but in the whole i am excited to see the way that the Lord provides my next path for me.
Although i do really miss my baby seester!
Living here is getting a lot easier, and the language is coming to me better, also i have built relationships with people which make it easier to communicate without words.
Coming here i knew that i would fall in love with the kids at the labor camps, but the lord has really emlarged my heart to love the Mexican people as a whole. Tina's mom has taught me a lot about her culture, she is Misteco, and has taken me under her wing to make sure that i know how to do everything the way that they do, which seems to be the hardest way possible...
I have fallen in love with the young teenage group of boys that we play soccer with and have in small groups.
At the labor camps we took pictures of people and the kids and handed them out, it was so difficult, these people dont have any pictures of anyone in their family, and they immediately put all others aside and only want more and more pictures for themselves, which was heart breaking to watch. Otherwise the people here seem to have things the right way, they put family before work and school, and social life, and all the things that Americans wrap their hearts around.
I am loving it here, and already after two weeks a lot of options have opened for me in the fall, a few that i am more excited about than others, but in the whole i am excited to see the way that the Lord provides my next path for me.
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
June 9, 2009
Sorry I did not write on the plane, but here I am now in San Vicente. I must admit that so far this missionary stuff has not been as hard as I was expecting, partly becuase I simply love what I get to do here and because the real work starts tomorrow. The Jon Greere guy that I had everyone at home praying for turned out to be a 22 year old guy from Murrieta, not scary at all, and he brought his friend Ryan. They were awsome, and I really hope to see them again! Thanks to those guys I not only got down here safely, I went the farthest I ever have out in the ocean on a boogie board, but next time it will be a surf board. Most importantly, I can honestly that even after only a day a half with them, I learned of most characteristics of my God.
Anyway, yesterday I woke up in the morning and made a fire outside, on the fire I heated up a huge tin of water, then I put that hott water into buckets and carried it inside to a foot in a half tall and two feet in diameter tub sitting on a cement floor with a curtain seperating me from the rest of Tina's house (who I am staying with for this week). While I was standing there completely naked and uncomfortable, trying to figure out how to wash my hair I could not help but say over and over "gracias dios" becuase although the lifestyle that I am now living here is so much different, and as I am changing everyday my God stays the same. Yes I have known that, but I have never been so thankful for it. Jon and I talked a bit about the characteristics of God and how to let Him be everything that He wants to in our lives, and while I was standing there I recognized how difficult it is for us to try to get to know all of those characteristics, how much more difficult would it be if He changed them as we tried to her to know Him?!?!
I have fallen in love with the book James in the last two days, and tonight we had about thirty young boys come to the Remnant Center where they split up into their small groups to learn the lesson prepared for them. The book Jame, a letter written many years ago is now my prayer to the Lord for these boys today, and tomorrow. After the lesson Tina and I served them nachos and played soccer with them. I am extremely excited to see them all again next Tuesday and plan to pray especially for Carlos and Christian during this week, that they may be more aware of what a real man is, and how that is only possible through God.
Tomorrow we are going to two labor camps and also have man more things planned...I will update you again when I can.
Love you all!!!
Thank you for all of your prayers, my biggest request right now would be that I would have patience with the language barrier, it is not bad between the everyday people that I meet, but I want to be able to have better, deeper conversation with Tina and it has been difficult.
Buenas Noches!
Anyway, yesterday I woke up in the morning and made a fire outside, on the fire I heated up a huge tin of water, then I put that hott water into buckets and carried it inside to a foot in a half tall and two feet in diameter tub sitting on a cement floor with a curtain seperating me from the rest of Tina's house (who I am staying with for this week). While I was standing there completely naked and uncomfortable, trying to figure out how to wash my hair I could not help but say over and over "gracias dios" becuase although the lifestyle that I am now living here is so much different, and as I am changing everyday my God stays the same. Yes I have known that, but I have never been so thankful for it. Jon and I talked a bit about the characteristics of God and how to let Him be everything that He wants to in our lives, and while I was standing there I recognized how difficult it is for us to try to get to know all of those characteristics, how much more difficult would it be if He changed them as we tried to her to know Him?!?!
I have fallen in love with the book James in the last two days, and tonight we had about thirty young boys come to the Remnant Center where they split up into their small groups to learn the lesson prepared for them. The book Jame, a letter written many years ago is now my prayer to the Lord for these boys today, and tomorrow. After the lesson Tina and I served them nachos and played soccer with them. I am extremely excited to see them all again next Tuesday and plan to pray especially for Carlos and Christian during this week, that they may be more aware of what a real man is, and how that is only possible through God.
Tomorrow we are going to two labor camps and also have man more things planned...I will update you again when I can.
Love you all!!!
Thank you for all of your prayers, my biggest request right now would be that I would have patience with the language barrier, it is not bad between the everyday people that I meet, but I want to be able to have better, deeper conversation with Tina and it has been difficult.
Buenas Noches!
Friday, June 5, 2009
Leaving Tomorrow
Holy Moly,
I leave tomorrow! The last week has been insane trying to get everything together, but Jesus has really been taking care of me. I have learned so much about Him in the last week, and how to serve Him, how to accept what He has for me, what He wants for me.
I have a lot of peace knowing that you will all be praying for me, so thank you!
I will write again when I get on the plane tomorrow. :)
Verses for today Psalm 139:13-16,
He made us to the T how He wanted to, which means that we should be striving to use the characteristics He has placed in us to be used the way He wants to use us.
I leave tomorrow! The last week has been insane trying to get everything together, but Jesus has really been taking care of me. I have learned so much about Him in the last week, and how to serve Him, how to accept what He has for me, what He wants for me.
I have a lot of peace knowing that you will all be praying for me, so thank you!
I will write again when I get on the plane tomorrow. :)
Verses for today Psalm 139:13-16,
He made us to the T how He wanted to, which means that we should be striving to use the characteristics He has placed in us to be used the way He wants to use us.
Monday, May 25, 2009
12 DAYS!!!
twelve days from now i will be driven to the sacramento airport to catch a 10:50 am flight that will land me in San Diego at 12:20 where i will meet a stranger will a sign "Kayla", who i can only pray speeks English. Then, the not-so-stanger and i will drive across the border and into San Vicente, Mexico. Once i get there my new friend and i wil unload my things and i will embrace my new home for ten weeks, unless He has diffferent plans for me once i get there.
I am unable to express the amount of excitment i have in knowing that i will be returning to America a new woman. After a very rough semester God is taking me on an amazing adventure where He is going to reveal aspects of His character that i have never known. Where i am in my life right now allows me the priviledge of confidently stating that i am going to dwell in every new chacteristic He reveals, no more doubting, no more hestition, and no more consience disobedience.
Only Telve Days!!!
I am unable to express the amount of excitment i have in knowing that i will be returning to America a new woman. After a very rough semester God is taking me on an amazing adventure where He is going to reveal aspects of His character that i have never known. Where i am in my life right now allows me the priviledge of confidently stating that i am going to dwell in every new chacteristic He reveals, no more doubting, no more hestition, and no more consience disobedience.
Only Telve Days!!!
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